In the corporate business world, one of the most and risky things you can do is date a coworker.
Most companies have strict rules forbidding inter-office relationships.
If you own the company, it makes total sense. No CEO or executive running a company wants to be distracted by endless sexual harassment lawsuits.
Despite the legal safeguards, over 40% of employees have admitted to having a romantic relationship with a coworker at one point or another. Since these relationships are happening, you might as well have concrete information about how to do it best, since you are risking your job (cash) in your quest for love (ass).
Don’t focus on the physical
The line between asking a coworker out and engaging in sexual harassment is unfortunately pretty thin, and even well-intentioned invitations can often be taken the wrong way. To ensure that nothing is misinterpreted, keep your focus off of anything physical when asking your office crush out.
For example, rather than saying “I think you’re beautiful/handsome/hot and would like to take you out,” instead say “I find you really interesting, and I’d like the chance to get to know you better.”
Not only will this help you avoid charges of sexual harassment, but your crush will likely be more flattered when you compliment their personality over their looks.
Start with groups
Remember back in middle school, when kids would go on big group dates rather than coupling off? It turns out that this innocent practice might help you with office dating as well. Suggesting a group outing with several coworkers will help keep the pressure low, and allow you and your crush a more organic way to get to know each other. And if you fear rejection from someone you have to see in the office everyday, this is a good way to ask them out without really asking them out.
Know company policy
Many companies have rules about management not dating subordinates, disclosing serious relationships, and not engaging in displays of affection in the workplace. Chances are you were given some sort of handbook or code of conduct when you were first hired at your current job. Now is a good time to review the section on office relationships, so that you can be ahead of the game should things turn serious with your office crush.
Don’t date your boss
It’s easy to develop a crush on your direct superior, especially if you admire their work. But unless you value your potential relationship over your entire career, it is probably best to keep this crush a secret. Most companies frown on it, and every accomplishment (or setback) you have at work will be tainted by the question of whether you truly deserved it.
Alcohol and other judgment-inhibiting substances can help you loosen up and have fun on a first date, but they can also make you say or do things you might later regret, and that regret can increase tenfold when a coworker is involved. Until a strong level of trust is established in the relationship, try to avoid overindulging.
Tips in conjunction with Roc